Opinions and Other Smelly Topics

Those who know me know I do a lot of online reading. I like to stay informed. and I try to read what both sides of any topic are saying. I have to say, it is pretty shameful how many people talk when stating their opinions. I'm not talking strictly liberals, conservatives, atheists or Christians. I am talking about all of them. I have said some pretty shameful things in the past, but I think I've learned a very valuable lesson from befriending a certain lady that thinks totally differently from me about political matters. If you feel the need to state your opinion to someone, never put it on a personal basis.

Name calling is one of the most destructive forms of communication. Yet, many who state their opinion seem to feel that the only way they can change someone's mind is to attack them with labels and bad language. The bullying of our children has come under such scrutiny lately, simply because we see the effects of it, and we loathe such behavior. Still, a great majority of our adult population uses bullying and belittling to one another to make their case. Where do we think these child bullies learn this stuff? They learn it at home, even at school by their teachers. Labeling and name calling have become a way of life, and then we wonder why there is so much hate in the world!

Never use the word "You". Such things as, "You can't seem to get it through your head!" "You are crazy to think such things!" "You conservatives! You all think alike!" "You liberals are all power hungry!" are not only juvenile, they are ineffective. It is so easy to slip into this way of thinking and speaking, and it is an attack on the other person's integrity rather than a statement of fact about the subject. We must be willing to attack the subject matter only. We must know the facts so that we can logically speak about them.

Even worse is the name calling that I see. Again, it is bullying technique that is useless to solve any problem. When calling people names it seems that we'll go to any length to find a word or label to so humiliate and offend, as if drawing attention more to the foolishness of the person's opinion than the problem itself.

I'm convinced that the real problem is that most people simply have an opinion, but they have no facts to back it up. It is ignorance, due to laziness for not wanting to do the work to know what to say. Have you ever noticed how many people will quote things that they have been told are in the bible that are not really there? Who do you know that believes something about our country's Constitution that isn't there at all? If you listen to one side of a news report, it's a good thing to tune in to the other side's reports. You seldom get the whole story from one side of the fence.

When my friend and I discuss politics we seldom get through it without exasperation or raising our voices. We've been known to yell in public places and cause our husbands to shrink back in angst. But we never point verbally or physically to one another. The discussion isn't about us, it's about politics. I admit that she has a better memory for facts than I do, and that really makes me want to resort to finger pointing, but I must refrain. Then, we move on to better subjects like where we're going for lunch, and we laugh our way through the doors. A difference of opinion is never worth hurting another's feelings, bullying or character assassination. My opinion is not more important than my friendship. Know the facts, or keep still.

The Perfect Parents

Parents constantly beat themselves up emotionally when any of their children grow to live contrary to what they've been taught during their childhood. We ask, "What did I do wrong?" "What should I have done differently?" "If I had only loved a little more." "Did I love too much?" "What went wrong?" Isn't it a shame that most parents are so eager, most are too eager, to take the blame for their child? God forbid we should allow our child to suffer a little or take on some responsibility for their own actions!

If you read the comments on social media or those attached to news items online you see some of the reason why parents feel so guilty. Those comments are written, almost without exception, by the luckiest parents in the world whose children grew to adulthood to be okay.....anyway. In other words, the parents weren't perfect, but the kids are mature and responsible anyway. Consequently, mom and dad believe that it's all due to their tremendous parenting skills, and if your kid didn't turn out quite so well, well it's no doubt because you were an unloving or inattentive mother who probably worked instead of staying home where good mothers always are. Or, dad was not loving enough, and never came home from work at a decent hour. It's all the parents' fault!

Then there's the men and women who know everything about rearing children, even though they've never had a child and have never even been married. But, it's obvious to them whose fault that kid's problems are, and frankly, they know more about what makes a good marriage, as well.

Let's just take a step back for a minute. I know for a fact that there are terrible and irresponsible parents. I may have been one of them. But, when children reach a certain age, the parent of a normal boy or girl should be able to realize that, no matter if you weren't totally perfect, that child is old enough to know right from wrong, know the basics that he or she was taught, and should now have brains enough to be the responsible one.

Now, I'm not talking about your basic juvenile delinquent here. I'm talking about Tom and Mary's son Tom Jr. who is off smoking pot at age 17 or worse, bullying the 14 year old whose nose is off center, or their daughter Cindy Lou who's rude and obnoxious to most of her high school teachers. Both kids know better. Both kids were taught to have respect for others and to obey the laws. So, if they were taught by mom and dad, and they break the rules anyway, who's to blame?

If the finger pointers are going to use the bible, which they so often do, I sure would like to know what verses they're using to make their points. I can't seem to find anywhere in the good book that says that if a child goes wrong, it's always the parents' fault. What I do find is that the prodigal son had a loving and doting father, but the son strayed away regardless. I find that David was a man for God's heart, but Absalom, his son, had a murderous heart, and for that matter, so did David. Then there was Cain who murdered his brother. Wait a minute! Adam and Eve disobeyed their father, and guess Who that was! Even God, the Creator Father, has children who disobey. I think it's time that those of us who are nursing our guilty feelings about being such bad parents stand up for ourselves for a change. You and I weren't perfect, by any means. But, our offspring need to fess up to the fact that they know better, and it's all their fault for behaving so badly.

Those of you out there with such great adult children who are responsible, God-fearing, law-abiding. good-mannered people who mow their lawns every week and make sure the car payment is on time, need to make a note to yourselves. You should remind yourselves to thank your wonderful Father in heaven that your less than perfect nurturing skills didn't produce what you probably deserved. Be so very thankful that your child turned out okay......anyway......that you never again automatically blame a parent for some snot-nosed kid's bad attitude or foul mouth. You just don't know it, but your grown up, all-American kid was probably just like that once upon a time.

SHE'S JUST LIKE YOU AND ME

Today I was browsing through some pictures for another story that I had written when I glanced upon this one. I hurriedly read the caption, then moved quickly on. It wasn't what I was looking for. But the picture haunted me throughout the day. I normally get irritated if someone writes something as if it were said by God. But, I have done that, so who am I kidding? Later in the day I went back to look at the picture again, and I decided I wanted to write about it. There are some things on my mind that I want to share.

Most of us don't have the misfortune of knowing just what a woman like this goes through when she lives a life on the streets. We can only imagine what it must be like or what she must do to exist there. Television and movies have somewhat opened most of our eyes, so the reality of it becomes a bit clearer. But, truly and thankfully, we cannot take our imagination far enough to the depth of the deprivation she usually suffers. We just haven't got a clue.

My first thought when I went back to look at this picture was, "I wonder what we would do if a woman like this walked into our sanctuaries some Sunday morning for worship." And, I have a long list of answers that I wish with all my heart that we would do.  I can see myself running toward the back of the room as she slinks in through the door. "Come in! Come in!" I call to her. "We are so happy to have you here this morning. Please! Please come sit with me and my family while we worship."

And then, out of the corner of my eye I see Mr. and Mrs. Marvelous Jones rushing over to be introduced and welcoming this filthy woman, trying to make her feel more at ease. As I'm introducing her, the associate pastor's wife steps up, along with her two teenage daughters, Charity and Chastity, to say hello. Yes. I can see it all so clearly, just as Jesus has instructed us to do.

Or would I be the first to wrinkle my nose at her foreign odors that somehow we all recognize? Would we begin to whisper among ourselves, glancing to see where she went, hoping she won't come closer to where we sit? Would we speak to her at all, or would we leave that for the pastor, to do the dirty work, so to speak? After all, that's what we pay him for, isn't it? Where would our love go when faced with pure and ugly sin in our sanctuaries? Would she feel God's love, or would she see, as usual, man's base reactions to something they don't understand?

Is it possible that the real sin, in that case, would be the sin of those who not only personally know the grace of God's love but are unwilling to extend that same grace and love to one who has not experienced it? What are we afraid of? We know what Jesus would do and what He wants us to do, so what holds us back?  

Unfortunately, this scenario seldom, okay, probably never happens or will happen. And, perhaps I'm just being too hard on us Christians, but I doubt it. No matter what she has, or what we think she has done, we must always remember that we may smell better, our hair and clothes may be cleaner and neater, but to God, our sin is just as filthy as hers. We haven't the right to look down our noses at her or think of her as nasty or vile. We have no idea why she is the way she is. We haven't walked in her shoes, as they say. We only know that she needs the loving grace of the Savior just as we do, and we can find opportunities to tell her if we would just step out and say hello and show her God's love through His people.

He never said it would be easy, or even fun. But He has said, "If you love Me, obey me!" So, the question is, will we?

Appreciate the Gift That You Have

Not long ago I expressed my appreciation to a friend of the dedication and love that person applies to his ministry and to his friends and family. I also mentioned in the conversation that I appreciate the way he prays. Ashamedly I admit what I said was, "I'd give anything to pray like you do." What I meant by that is I admire the attitude with which he prays and his creative ways of blessing and thanking the Lord for so many different areas of our lives. The vastness of his ways of approaching the Father, and the love and devotion contained in his words, humble though they are, instills in me a desire to be as pleasing to God with my words as my friend must be with his.

The fact is, I have been given a different gift, a gift of writing. I delight in the gift because I know He gave it to me. I began writing when I was a very young girl when my imagination was forming, and I lived in a dream world. Today I still live in that dream world, and I have an endless imagination, but, longingly I would prefer to write about my Savior and what He has done, and is doing, in me. There's nothing that I can imagine in my mind that is more exciting than that reality. All I need is a thought, a suggestion or some small inspiration and the words just flow onto my keyboard. I don't have to think much about it, plan it, outline it, or do much rewriting. This is my Father's gift to me.

The other fact is, as easily as writing comes for me, when I stand to speak, or if I'm called on to pray aloud, the thoughts detour and falter, and the words become muddled and repetitive and limited to phrases and cliches that I have heard most of my life in "religious" community. These are methods of which I have always had distaste. It would seem that when speaking my tongue goes faster than my brain; or could it be the opposite? My thoughts go in ten different directions, and when my mouth opens it can't remember what it really wanted to say. What frustration!

If I am so concerned about what or how I am talking to God, He will be little pleased. The Holy Spirit urges me to pray with abandon, with no thought for anyone, anything, or for myself; only for Him. Only for Him!

I can, and should show appreciation for my friends and their gifts. But my gift is different, and so I will bless Him for it!

Get Out of the Box!

Yesterday on Facebook I mentioned a term that our pastor used Sunday morning, "entrenched religion". I liked the term because I thought it so eloquently explains how we can sometimes get so comfortable, so settled into the ways we worship that we only see the process and not the Father. 

Thinking about it again this morning I realized that is what I have called "tradition", and how I dislike that word so much. My son-in-law said one morning when teaching a class while I was visiting there that tradition is putting our worship in a box, not willing to get out, and we miss all the wonderful ways to please Him that are outside the box because we're not comfortable out there. We should be willing to lower ourselves to the point of putting ourselves face down on the floor, to become as insignificant as possible, in order to raise Him up and place Him where He belongs, above all creation. 

God is without end. His ways and His being is without end. We should be willing to grasp all the wonderful ways, without end, that we can that glorifies Him, gives Him honor, and lets Him know in so many new ways every day that we recognize how worthy He is to be praised!

Illumination

I'm very selective when I want to watch a movie. There are very few that I like, and those that I do like I will watch numerous times. I have watched my favorite movie, the 1995 version of Pride and Prejudice, at least one hundred times. Obviously, I can quote all the lines which is one reason I seldom watch it with anyone. I'm told it's quite annoying.

The Indiana Jones series has always been a favorite, but Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade is the best of the set. There are lines that I find so interesting, considering the director, Stephen Spielberg, is an Orthodox Jew. The main theme of the movie is to find the "cup of Christ", and the last scenes are full of talk related to Christian faith. One of the last scenes has Indiana Jones stepping off a bottomless precipice as a "step of faith", and is caught by an invisible force, only to walk straight across to the other side. 

The scene from that movie that I thought about this morning is a scene that involves Indiana Jones' father who is a man of Christian faith and a professor of archeology. He is reading an historic book that he hopes will give him information that will lead him to his lifelong quest; finding the "cup of Christ". As he reads he prays, "Lord, illuminate me", a  simple three word prayer that says so much about his character. He prays for a light, a sign from God, to show the way to an artifact thought to be used by Jesus at the Last Supper.

How often do we think of "illumination" when we are praying? Asking God to "show me the way" or for "His will" doesn't quite compare to being "illuminated". To be shown His will for my life is one thing, but to have His light invade my soul seems to me to be so much more.

A man in our church prayed a prayer a few weeks ago that made a huge impression on me. He prayed that we would not be satisfied with our relationship as it is with Christ, but that we would desire to "go deeper, go deeper, go deeper" in our walk with Him. He prayed this with a passion that transferred to me and to my desires, and I've not been able to forget him saying this over and over. It is a desire that I had, but I had not recognized, or, perhaps, just not put feet to in a way that Jesus would have me do. I have always thought that I had a strong desire for His word and His presence in my life, but now I am aware that I must accept this challenge to go deeper.

Another source of inspiration for me lately has been in my reading materials. I have been reading "A Passion for God" and "The Attributes of God", both books written by A. W. Tozer.

It is almost impossible to read these without feeling that challenge to want more, and to want to give more back to Him.

So, I pray, "Lord. Illuminate me! Open my heart wide to be filled with the Light of all creation so that I might know You better, and that my relationship with You will "go deeper". In the powerful name of Jesus, my Lord and Savior! amen."

What About You?

I don't know about you, but I really dislike watching the antics of someone who is seeking attention. It's a self-centered attempt to make sure everyone sees no one but them. But it leaves a very sour taste.

It is with great regret that I have to admit that I naturally draw attention. My height, for a woman, is abnormal. My girth has developed over the years well beyond what I would have wished, and, therefore, just my presence is overwhelming. People stare. But I'm used to it.

Another regret I have is that I can be considered an emotional person, sensitive, joyful, full of laughter, I cry easily, sobbing can be involved, i am easily excited and I can be quite exuberant, actually. That, too, can be embarrassing, and I've never quite gotten over that. Why? Because it draws attention. And I already draw attention naturally. And I really don't like that.

So, here's the crux of the matter. I love Jesus Christ with my whole being. He has saved me from a life that was a sure path of death and destruction, both physically and spiritually. I am grateful beyond words, measureless, and I become overwhelmed emotionally with that gratefulness very often in our worship. I want to jump, shout, cry out, dance, and shout some more. Sometimes it is so difficult to contain all that passion that I can hardly breathe.

What does one do with all of that passion when one knows how it looks to others? They'll think I'm trying to draw attention to myself, and that won't be the case, truly. And each time I stifle my true inner feelings I go away with regret that I have not given Him all that I owe Him in my worship. No vow to prevent it from happening again will induce me, at least until this writing, to overcome my fear of being misunderstood by people in order to obey and adore my Savior and Lord.

I don't know about you, but I really need to overcome this sin of pride.