In My Memory, But Not In My Heart

There is an old adage that "Time heals all wounds", but I believe that a better, more accurately adage would be, "God heals all wounds".  I have experienced that time heals, or eases, all scars from the wounds.

I am pondering this morning how the process of time has lessened the pain of the many years of living in the world of sin since I have been healed by the saving blood of Jesus Christ.  I can remember how, in the beginning of my walk with Him, the pain was so intense that I could hardly control my remorse. Facing the despicable in the pure light of righteousness was overwhelming for me, and it took years to come to a place of no longer identifying with that despicable person?

During these twenty-seven years of being a born again believer I have been taught to leave the old person, put on the new person, and to forget that which I have left behind.  These were Paul's direct instructions to the Philippians in chapter 3, verse 13, "...one thing I do; forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead,".  But how does one forget thirty-seven years of one's life? And, due to the constant upheavals and destruction and pain, how does one forget such memorable years?

In the words of a very famous person I guess I have come to the conclusion that it is all in how you interpret the word "forget".  I will never, and I cannot forget what my past behavior was.  Nor do I believe that God would have me to forget.  Rather, I believe His instructions to me have been very clear that I am to move forward in His ways and by His Word, Jesus being my example of my goal and for "the prize of the upward call of God in Jesus Christ". Phil. 3:14.  And all the while He reminds me to never forget what He has saved me from, and I believe that is for two reasons.  Number one is that it keeps me humble, knowing that without Him I am less than nothing.  Number two is for having a reference point to help others who I see walking on the same path that I walked at one time.  God has used me over the years to relate to people in need. 

After so many years of walking in the midst of other Christians, living in a world away from most of the temptations of life, and now being of retirement age when most people settle down and live the quiet life I no longer fit the stereotype of one you would search out if you are living in a world of sin and need to find a person who understands. When I meet with those who have stories similar to mine and that have not yet discovered the victory that Christ provides it is exciting for me to see the looks of astonishment on faces, and then see the understanding of what Christ can do for them.  Christ changes people.  I am not the same person that I was, and I don't look like the same person. My countenance is different.  She doesn't exist anymore, but I will never forget so that I can show the way.

I do not mean to say that I have arrived.  I have a long way to go yet, and I am learning and growing every day.  But I am so completely a different being that I think I could easily be mistaken for one who has always been in church, so to speak, without experiences of the world.  Oh, how I envy those Christians sometimes.  But, I have a different job than they do, and I am called to share what I can to help the lost.

That "F" Word!

You know the "F" word I'm talking about. As a young person I used this word often, and I felt very good and proud of myself for having the freedom, the hutzpah (if you will), the bravado to say it. My language was peppered with words unacceptable to society, and that's what I loved about it.

Today I realize that it really isn't the words that are unacceptable, it is the attitude that inspires these words. The attitude is that of disrespect for anything that you don't like. It is an attitude saying, "I don't like you." "I don't like that." "I am going to shock you." "I want you to see me." "I want to stand out." "I want attention." "I want to be anything that you don't like." I could go on and on, but the main idea is using language that shocks or is unacceptable means that other people don't matter, it's all about you.

This is just another way of rebelling against the norm, and when this becomes the norm the new generation will think of something new that will shock you. The secret to getting along in this world and keeping peace that we all cry out for is to be respectful of others. This doesn't mean tolerance. Too much tolerance leads to too much bad happening in the world.

I ask you, respectfully, to be respectful. Think of and be sensitive to others and their beliefs or what they are accustomed to. If you admit the truth, that's probably exactly what you want in return. But majority says, clean it up, care about others. Be respectful.

Encouraging Each Other

So often I get the feeling that a lot of Christians I have been with are very timid about expressing their deep feelings for God. They are very comfortable with being known as a Christian, an active member of a church, able to quote scripture. But, ask some to testify to how they feel and they are very timid and slow to jump up and open their hearts. "Ask me what I know, but don't ask me what I feel."

Standing outside the sanctuary of worship we open our hearts readily and enthusiastically to one another on many other subjects. "Did you see that purse that Jane was carrying? I LOVE that purse!" "Hey, George! Watch that new running back on our team. I LOVE to watch him dart through the openings those great linemen give him!" It's so easy to express our love for the outside things in life. Where is our passion for the only One thing in our lives that counts for anything? What causes our reluctance to verbalize our deep love for Him?

There are many reasons that this can happen. Some are just naturally shy, not ever comfortable with public expression of love. Some find it difficult to put into words the depth and extent of their faith. Some are afraid, afraid of what others will think of them, afraid they will appear to be attention grabbing, afraid to be seen as foolish and, heaven forbid, emotional. Perhaps they've experienced others being very quick to demonstrate and voice their thoughts and feelings, and they have thought these things about them.

God has made each of us uniquely. We each have our own personality that dictates to us how we respond to life. You are extroverted. I am introverted. He is stoic. She is an emotional cripple! All of us wanting to be like the other. Some of us thanking the Father that they are not like me. But, it seems to me that when we are speaking of our Creator, our Savior, or our Comforter that we should be so expressive as to humble ourselves prostrate on the floor, in the mud, as low as we can get to tell and show the world and our brothers and sisters in Christ how deeply and passionately we adore Him. Jesus made Himself "nothing" the bible says, and died a reprobate's death on the cross for ME, for YOU! How can I hold back anything from Him?

In a bible study group last night I was brought to tears by a woman in our midst. She is naturally a quiet and reserved lady. Her observations to us can sometimes be few, and when she does speak her words can be measured, reserved and quiet. But, last night when she spoke of the Holy Spirit a passion came into her voice and onto her face that surprised and delighted me. Speaking of the Holy Spirit she said forcefully, "I LONG for the Holy Spirit! I LOVE the Holy Spirit so much. I am drawn to Him, and I FEEL His presence!" About Jesus she impressed upon us, "Jesus is so real to me. And the Holy Spirit is so real to me!"

Such simple words spoken in love and devotion gripped my heart. These are words that I could echo, but I hadn't. And hearing them from her was a blessing to me that is just unspeakable. Her words filled me with His love, His presence, and reminded me that I am not alone in this wicked world. I have brothers and sisters who feel just like I feel about Him. I have this wonderful soul mate sitting with me, hardly able to express the depth of her love, but doing it anyway, with halting, tearful words.

One woman I know was challenged on her faith and simply quoted, "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the bible tells me so." Another man stood up in church one night, a very distinguished and composed man, and with tears on his face simply said, "Jesus paid it all."

Let us all remember that we who love God are all challenged in so many ways to open ourselves up and spill out all that we can to show Him our gratitude and praise. Each word we speak, as simple as they must be to Him is music to His ears, makes God want to smile and sing over us. And, each time you speak a word of worship and praise, another brother or sister is reminding themselves of their own feelings and are encouraged, not only to speak, but to strive to draw closer and to be more like Christ. We owe each other the blessing of sharing Him with one another.

Difficult People Can Be Very.....um.....Difficult

A few years back I was having an especially emotional day and trying to get some chores done around the house. My highs and lows were getting to me, so I knew without a doubt that the others in the house had to be feeling the tension of dancing around my occasional bouts of temper. I had been prescribed an anti-depressant while I had been hospitalized for surgery just a few months back, so I had become unaccustomed to these emotional swings, and found them to be very unnerving.

My married daughter had come for a visit, and she, along with my husband, were in the kitchen. My daughter was doing some baking, and my husband was reading at the kitchen table. This was a peaceful, every day setting, but I just wasn't feeling that peaceful, and I didn't like the unsettled feeling.

I was doing laundry, and as I bent over to load the clothes from the washer to the dryer I made a passing comment, more to myself than to anyone else, but loud enough that the pair in the kitchen overheard me.

With my head tucked into the dryer I said, "I don't think my Zoloft is doing a very good job today."

Without a skip of a beat my daughter and her dad glanced at one another, and together they remarked, "Oh-oh."

Funny? They thought so. So did I, to a point. I seldom mind being the brunt of a joke or light moment, but I don't like having a bad effect on others. The thought of them having a tense moment caused by me was more unsettling to me than the Zoloft not working. I don't like making others feel uncomfortable, and yet, that's exactly what I unintentionally have done most of my life. My off-beat sense of humor makes some people get wide-eyed and not a little ill at ease, not knowing just exactly what I am saying.

Additionally, I am too blunt in some of my observations, I am not one to shy away from a good debate, and I am entirely too opinionated. Again, these are characteristics that put many people off. I have prayed, confessed, repented, and sworn to do better many times. Yet, I continue to slip back into these bad habits far too quickly.

I continue to ask the Father for help, and I know that He is continually working on me and my ways. This isn't a cry for help from anyone. It isn't a subject that I would welcome input from anyone on.  I'm just saying....

But I sure do need a lot of prayer and patience from my friends.

And, meanwhile, this little anecdote continues to serve up chuckles for my family, and, that, I like.

Reaching Out To "Gomer"

Last night I attended church, and the pastor there mentioned the book of Hosea. Hosea tells about Gomer, his wife, or is it Israel that the story is about? Theologians can't decide, so I'm sure I can't. Nevertheless, I choose to believe, for the sake of my story today, that it is about a woman of, shall we say ill repute? That's the nice way to put it. God told Hosea to marry her, even knowing what kind of woman she was, and Hosea obeyed. And he didn't argue with God, and he didn't fuss or complain about it, and he didn't complain about her. He just simply obeyed God.

Since the day I first heard the story of Hosea I have had a very soft spot for it. I have always thought I would have liked to have known Gomer. She was a very interesting woman and most certainly required a lot of understanding to really know her. Some would call her evil and dirty, not worthy to be thought about except with disgust. Some might give her a chance, but never a second chance. Even to the people who didn't know God she would have been considered trash, filthy, stinking garbage. But, with all my heart I believe that these are the dear ones who need God's people the most, to love them, to encourage them and wrap their arms around them, draw them close enough to really smell them, and show them the true love of God.

People like Gomer have never experienced real love. Lots of times they have been mistreated to the point that they believe there is no such thing. Some have experienced physical intimacy and deceived into believing that this is love. So, they search and search for a love that never comes, building walls against people, living lies with bad reputations and no thought for anyone but themselves. It's a black pit of hopelessness that they dig and can never find the way out. And all the time all they want is to be wanted and loved.

Amazingly, I definitely have known some Gomers. Some of the Gomers I've known I had to leave behind due to their lack of response to the Truth or due to their total disdain of it. A very few of the Gomers I've known are now healed and love God and are loved by God's people, and they walk in Truth. They are miraculous stories of how God never gives up on us, never stops loving us even when we may be garbage.

If we say "yes" to God as Hosea did, we can reach out to every unbeliever, no matter how evil or filthy we believe them to be. Under all that filth is a child that God loves and wants in His family. When I turn away it's possible that I was the only one that God could use to help win that one that He loves so much.
And then God uses that new child of the kingdom to reach out to others. Imagine. Gomer can be out there winning souls for Jesus Christ!

I don't want to say "no" to God. I don't want to have to answer for the soul that didn't come because I wouldn't obey Him. As a former "Gomer", I know well how different a life can be when you know the Truth. I understand the miraculous effects of coming from a life of lies and filthy rags to being a "sweet perfume" to our loving Father. I know intimately the majestic Father, His Son, and His Spirit that leads my life and makes me, imagine it, more like Jesus every day.

I pray that each one of us can meet and learn to love a "Gomer". There is so much that they need to know about what true love is all about. And we have so much to learn about the wonderful miracles that God performs even today. There is a chance for each one, for God loves each one specially and completely, no matter how they smell.

God, Talking To Himselves

                         

One day God was sitting back, looking over mankind as He always does, and He decided that today was going to be the day. He'd been planning this for a long, long time, and He had everything in place that He needed. So God, in His infinite wisdom, called together His committee, His Son, and His sweet Holy Spirit and looked at Them lovingly.

"I'm ready to get started." God told Them. "I know You are excited to finally do this, so I'm going to lay it all out for You. Take notes if You need to."

God's Son and The Holy Spirit looked at each other and rolled Their eyes. Since when did They ever need notes to remember everything? God knew this, and He knew that They had rolled Their eyes, though He hadn't been looking up. God chuckled to Himself knowingly, and the others chuckled with Him. "We have such fun together," They all thought to Themselves.

So, God continued talking to Himselves, "You know I have had my eye on that little girl in Nazareth that we created a few years ago, and we were right, she's perfect for this mission. She's old enough now to conceive a child, and she just recently was chosen by that guy Joseph that we talked about. I like him. He's a good Jewish boy, a little older than she is, but still, I like him."

"Yes, yes," interrupted The Holy Spirit,"but I still don't understand why in God's name, oops, sorry Sir, we put her in Nazareth. It's suppose to be Bethlehem!" His eyes opened wide, "Hello!!"

"I know, I know," answered God. "Calm Yourself. I've got this all worked out. You worry way too much, You know. You need to trust me on this."

"Yeah, well I trust You, I just don't understand why sometimes You just do things the hard way, kind of screwy. No offense, Sir."

"No offense taken. It's those foolish humans that make Me do things the hard way. If they'd just listen and do what I tell them. They trust Me even less than You do." God shook His majestic head in dismay. "Now, I've got everything covered here, so listen up. Son! Are You listening?"

"To every syllable, My Father." 

And God smiled.

"Okay. That Augustus guy in Rome has decided he's a big shot, and he wants to know how many people he can count that he can make cow-tow to him. What a jerk! So he's ordered that they take a census, and everyone will have to go to the city of their forefathers to be counted. Get it? City of their forefathers?"

The Holy Spirit sat straight up in His chair. "Oh, sure! I get it now! Bethlehem! That's the city where Benjamin and David came from. Whoa!  This is just way cool!"

God is thinking how bright that Holy Spirit is.

 "But, wait a minute."

"Oh, no." thought God. The Holy Spirit was thinking again. 

"Okay. From Nazareth to Bethlehem. Isn't that like eighty miles or more? Won't that girl have to go eighty miles while she's pregnant, I mean VERY pregnant? Like, H-U-G-E pregnant! God, are You sure You've thought all this through?"

"Sometimes You are so exasperating. Didn't I say, 'Trust Me?'  I'll see to it that she and the baby and Joseph get there safe and sound. What's the problem? Eighty miles of good road with a few of their friends tagging along for company, and I'll make sure they've got the best donkey on the market, brand new, never been ridden. It's gonna be a cakewalk! Yes, she'll be a little uncomfortable, but I'll take care of her. You've just gotta trust me on this."

God's Son glanced at The Holy Spirit with disdain then turned back to His Father. "Abba, this sounds perfect. I know how diligently You have planned this, and I know, without a doubt, it's going to be fantastic. I'm ready to go anytime. Just give the word."

God thought He heard kissing sounds coming from The Holy Spirit, but He decided to let it go. "Kids." He muttered and moved on.

"It's going to be very important for the girl's sanity that we get her out of Nazareth to spare her of all those sharp tongues wagging about her. Sheesh. I've got quite a few stories about them I could repeat, but I won't......yet. Their day will come if they don't change their ways. Well, that's why I'm sending You there, Son. Okay! Let's get the lead out! Holy Spirit, You've got that star ready to go? And We've got to get those guys from the east moving, too. I'm counting on You!"

"You can count on me, Sir! I've got everything on my list ready." The Holy Spirit said this with pride, then realized He had revealed something that maybe He would have liked to have kept to Himself.

"Well, You know, Sir, sometimes I do have to write things down, You know, just in case."

They all smiled and quickly dispersed to accomplish the great task.

"We are such a cool team," God thought. "Lombardi ain't got nothing on Us."

NO MORE POWER

At the end of October most of the northeast states were pelted with heavy snow over a  weekend.  Pictures of power lines and trees were shown laying on the ground weighted down with the snow.  I read it on the computer news.  "MANY HAVE NO POWER AFTER THE STORM". 

I guess that's always the way it is, isn't it?  When you are weak and the storms come along unexpectedly you are destined for a downfall.  The heavy snow causes the smaller limbs and the weaker, some even dead, trees to fall and are destroyed.  The power lines that were not replaced with underground cable were vulnerable to the harsh winds and snow.

How strong are you after, or during, a storm?  Have you done the preparation needed to withstand not only the every day problems, but the days of tragedy and pain? 

Cities across the nation should plan ahead for the easiest transition when the storms come.  Even when they are most prepared they still can experience total shutdowns.  But as a people of Jesus Christ we must prepare daily with God's Word and be fortified with His love. power, and protection against total shutdowns.