Alone

Lonliness is not something I feel often.  I've learned over the years how to be alone, and that I can be comfortable with it.  In fact, most of the time I enjoy being alone.  It's easier if you are a selfish person, liking to have your own way, not wanting to have to bow to others' wishes.  I was brought up alone, so I started my life having my own way except when out with my playmates and friends.  I had no problem sharing with and submitting to them .

But today I am feeling it; very lonely and alone.  I am retired, my husband still works, and my only companions are my four best friends, my dogs.  They require little and give to me so much love that I am happy to submit to their occasional whims. 

Today I miss my parents, especially my mom.  I just passed the anniversary of their deaths, and it is approaching Christmas.  I don't go through this every year, but this year, today, I can hardly stop the tears. Today I am feeling very alone.

I am quite good at feeling sorry for myself.  It goes along nicely with being selfish.

I'll get over it, and rather quickly, to tell the truth.  Right now, I must enjoy my lonliness.